“Give the world the best you have and the best will come back to you.”
—Madeline Bridges
I love this quote! It is applicable to so many aspects of our lives. For example, work, education, avocation, sports. We know that if we want to succeed in any endeavor, we have to work at it. This is true for family, school, business, exercise, and other life endeavors. Success takes hard work. But it is achievable. It can be done.
Succeeding in Your Relationship
But does hard work really pay off when it comes to our relationships?
Divorce selfies are trending on Twitter and Instagram under the hashtag #divorceselfies. This is an interesting phenomenon involving people who wish to publicize their divorce. They typically post a happy picture of themselves as a couple following the finalization of the divorce. Many acknowledge how glad they are to have had the relationship, but speak of accepting that the relationship did not work out. This is a sign of couples opting to bow out gracefully during the process of divorce.
This is a new trend in divorce. Gone is the acrimony, the fights, the anger and bad blood. Instead, many couples are admitting that the relationship did not work for them, choosing instead to end things on good terms. They are celebrating the good that happened in the relationship, honoring the marriage experience, and moving on to friendship or even to working together to co-parent post marriage.
Not that long ago, there was a stigma attached to being divorced. You were odd man or woman out if you were a single parent. People felt ashamed when a marriage ended up in divorce. This new trend is a completely different way to look at a failed marriage. In fact, the progression marks a significant social change.
A recent interview with Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie indicated several impressive aspects of their relationship. I wasn’t surprised. But many people might be. After all, the general public has a range of reactions to the two superstar celebrities.
If you polled people about Brad and Angelina’s marriage and how they feel about the couple, responses would be polarized. Some find their relationship romantic and inspirational. But many people cling to opinions from the past. They think Brad was stolen away from Jennifer Aniston, to whom he was married when he fell for Angelina. They may claim Angelina was a home-wrecker who broke up Brad’s marriage.
I beg to differ. I believe the truth lies somewhere in between and what we did not see is more important than what was told to us via tabloids, gossip, and third person accounts.
Bill Cosby and other fragmented African-American men are a sore topic these days. Black males in America have been demoralized throughout our history and, as a result, the black community has become protective of their image, character representation, and how we discuss them in public.
Race discussions can be highly charged. We are hypersensitive because of the backlash associated with racism. Nobody wants to be perceived as a racist. There is also a troubling social double standard so whenever a minority male does something wrong, the reflection on the African-American community as a whole makes the matter worse.
I am a part of the African-American community. What disturbs me is when we either fail to address or try to justify bad behavior to protect a member of the black community. This does not have good consequences for us as individuals or as a community.
I am not a big reality show fan, but I have to admit it is brave to put your yourself and your life out there for the world to see, vulnerabilities and all. This makes it that much more interesting for me as I watch the current drama between Lamar Odom and Khloe Kardashian unfold. Will they give love another chance? Should they?
Relationships tend to be great in the beginning. Getting along is usually a lot easier when you first get together with someone. After all, there are less dynamics to deal with when you only have two people in a relationship. However, as relationships mature, more responsibilities are added and a couple becomes a family. This expands the number of challenges you have to face, changing the dynamics of the relationship.
Do you feel stuck, frustrated, and at a loss when it comes to dating? Does it seem like you can never seem to find, then cultivate the right relationship for you? One that makes you happy, one that lasts?
Don’t despair. You’ve come to the right place.
Welcome to www.relationshipinvestigator.com. I’m Elizabeth Overstreet and I am a relationship investigator. I’m here to help you on your journey to finding and maintaining a healthy, happy relationship.
